507- I FOUND THEM!...I DID, I FOUND 'EM!....Introducing The Couple Who Come Up With All Of Those Dang New Drug Names!!....

A) The seventy-something couple, Chester and Bertie Mae Pennypacker, live in a small rustic mountain cabin built by his grandfather, up in a tranquil hollow on a distant ridge near Humpback in the Blue Ridge Mountains of Virginia! Little Chester, a faithful bluetick hound, is their constant companion, especially around breakfast and supper, skipping lunch to chase critters in the woods.
B) The couple, for years, has been the only ones to secretly ponder, think up and create those clever two or three-syllable names for all of the "new" drugs you see advertised constantly on TV. No one, for all that time, has had any clue as to how and who thought up the "trippingly-off-the-tongue" drug names, UNTIL this avid Virginia researcher went on the search and found Chester and Bertie Mae sittin' on their cabin front porch one early morning last week!
C) After breakfast, I saw Bertie Mae take out her old-fashioned notepad and a #2 sharpened pencil, whittled by Chester's trusty penknife, before beginning the couple's pondering session. Little Chester stretched out on the old wooden floor, with a yelp or three every time the two came up with yet another two or three-syllable title. And when they did, Bertie jotted it down and then walked into the front parlour, sat down at her new Dell 'puter and sent an e-mail to a billion $$ drug company president!
D) "Go4It!" Chester suddenly blurted out, causing me to startle. He paused his energetic rocking, too. "That's a good one, Bertie Mae! Don't know what drug, but the 'company' will up and like it! Go on in to the 'puter and send it away, please!" With that, Little Chester's tail did a non-stop wag for a spell.
E) Yes, America...that's how we get all of those new drug titles you'll find advertised every day on TV.
F) Also....notice every single drug advertised on TV has that lengthy disclaimer about what will happened if you DO have problems with their drug? That's in case, in a few months, YOU will develop threatening health problems. When YOu bring a civil suit, the lawyers will claim that "you shoulda know better!" Also II...then guess who will be paid mega-$$$$ for handling the case in a court? Are you guessing??
G) Oh...how much does Bertie Mae, Chester and Little Chester get paid?
Chester: "Not tellin' you, but you can look around our cabin in this hollow and SEE opulence!"
Bertie Mae: "Chester just learnt that 'opulence' word on the internet last night." Little Chester looked up at me, and his tail started wagging again, with gusto!